Slipknot

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• my past was shit...but now my life is ok ..i guess

  April 12, 2009 1 Comment

  at first i was tomboy then the biggest chav going my mum was an acholholic for quite a few years she hit rock bottom and split with my step dad hu poisiond my mind he smutherd me and did things to me i hated my self then me and my mum had a fight then she went heavier with drinking and started to loose it so she was put in hospital and then k2 which is a metal hospital she lost it she lost weight then gaind it and wne she was better she hit the booze again but evntully gave up with our help then i didnt get on with my mum that well we ignored each other i lockd my self in my room never realy wen tout i sorter avoided life i lost weight and tried stravin my self then i started goin punk and erm..before that i was loved like mad i was repsected ,i was happy, people askd for my help i did jobs for them...but when i went punk people started to erm..avoid me and then they started ignoring me then they started fights with me and yeh i lost....i didnt want to fight them but then i relised it was coz i was punk then i went highly depressed and erm...then my mum started falling out with me she lost the social side with me...so i hit a fukin brick wall i mean big time! i started fighting chavs and niggers i started relising no one was behind me to catch me so i pikd my self up and i started stikin up for my self then people lost it with me and said i was cocky and i had to respect my self i had no idol no hope i had lost it my hed was rammed in this wall then i went emo and strat hanging with skaters then i listend to slipknot and i think people relised i wanst going to change because i finally chose wat i wanted be so they talkd to me the skaters accepted me i started talking to my mum and poeple started to respect me more except my old freinds they are now acient my best freind kate known her all my life she admitted she didnt liek em being emo so i said "you dont like it then fuck off outa my face" so she did she slagged me off liek the rest of my old pals so i went to her face and said"you got a problem with me am i not wat u wanted me be U WNAN FUKIN START THIS EH? COME ON LETS AV IT LETS FUKIN SORT THIS SHIT OUT HOW ABOUT U FUKIN SORT UR LIFE OUT COZ UR DAD N MUM ARE FUKD UP UR FACE IS FUKD UP UR BRO IS MENTALY RETARDED UR FAMILY ARE A BUNCH OF FUKIN DOWNIES YEH!" then i lost it i was shaking then i blackd out but wen i came bak to my old self kate was on the floor coverd in blood i shit my self didnt relise wat id done but then i rmeberd how angry i was and after that everyone seems to fear me wen im angry, the ksaters and that they repsect me though they say i tell um how it is and they respect me for that and they think im a gd freind and that now my mum loves me and we get on so well we r like sisters and my brothers i dnt relay get along with apart from craig he likes me.....i think the hole thing has become better also i found a guy i love too bits so everything is working out brilliant all i can say is weve come along way and made it through rough shit and my mum is now partialy sighted coz of drink and now i help her alot and wen people call her it reaky angers me but overall im glad everything has workd out but for me i dnt care about my futre aslong as my freinds and my mum r ok i dnt giv a shit wat happends to me :) n tahts it i think ><

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• me ex angers me!

  April 3, 2009 1 Comment

  my ex broke my heart his name is mike before i met him i was soft, weak but when he broke my heart i was broken for weeks i stopped eating and everything then i realised he wnated me bak i just cudnt face him then i met my current bf hu i soon fell inlove with then i grew stronger thought to my self FUCK THIS SHIT! WHY LET SOME BASTERD GET ME DOWN i wanted to be strong and cold i felt it aswell so as i carried on with my life i started getting into heavier stuff like slipknot few months after i was a heartless absterds didnt giv a fuk about anyone only the people i realy cared for like my family and close freinds the rest i spat on treated like shit didnt trust anyone my hed was fukd up and then i relised it was mike hu did it becoz i was fukin hurt i built a shell around me so then i changed once again i made new freinds everyone now respected me a few months now and i relised im bak to my old self but the music still remained in my heart and then a few weeks after mike contacts me and says im not happy your inlove wen i love u i wnat u so i turnd to him and sed FUK U YOU BASTERD DONT U START THIS WITH ME IL FUKIN SLICE UR NEK N FUK U UP U HURT ME BAD BUT IL GET U BAK JUST COME TO BOLTON N SEE ME NOW IM STRONG N WISE I SEE RIGHT THREW U UR TELLIN ME U LOVE ME UR TELLING THE OTHER U LOVE THEM GO GET FUKD AND LEAVE ME ALONE OR IL COME LOOKIN FOR U! so he starts crying saying wat the hells gotten into me then turns angry n says fuk u ya slag so i went mad and said SLAG SAYS THE ONE HU SHAGGED UR 2 EX'S BEHIND MY BAK U CNT KEEP UR LEGS CLOSED!!!!!!!! now its today wer hes started to pull away from me hes still trying to get in contact but all i do is listen to slipknot rock my heart out with my bf while my bf plays drums and i think bak n think about mike just hopin hes fukin crying n alone!!!

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